Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in swallowssings' LiveJournal:

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Thursday, March 1st, 2007
8:30 pm	Cinco de Febrero is just a nipple tweak away Lots of wonderfulness in my life, too much to not write it down somewhere. When was the last time I used this? A year and a half ago? More? Eh, who gives a fuck. So pretty much what it comes down to is that everything I have ever wanted to happen in the past four years is happening AS WE SPEAK. I graduated from  high school exactly a week ago, I am in the process of moving out of my parents house and into an apartment with Arno, Luke, and Dylan (and shane garland in the summer), I play in a kick ass band which is going on a tour of eastern canada in April, I have a great job, and I'm even doing better at making friends. HOORAY FOR ME! On Monday, Cinco de Febrero, Luke and I are throwing a sweet Cinco De Febrero party, because, god damn it, february needs a better holiday. All friends are invited. There shall be tequila and tapas. It will be my first night in the apartment, so come and celebrate with me. I love you all. Current Mood: chipper Current Music: State of Shock - The Ex (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Friday, February 17th, 2006
10:42 pm	Lock 'em up, Maggie! Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. Father always knows best, Father knows the secret to success, Father always knows best, Father knows to kill all the rest. Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. My blood reeks of fish, Is that a gift from you? Is a little bit of Jesus, Oozing out of my womb? Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. Father always knows best, Father knows the secret to success, Father always knows best, Father knows to kill all the rest. Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. My heart is of stone, Did I inherit that from you? Did it come from the pedestal, On which you stood? Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. Father always knows best, Father knows the secret to success, Father always knows best, Father knows to kill all the rest. Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us, Papaus Adrianus, Papa’s gonna save us. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm not sure what I think about life right now. I've been making music again, that makes me so happy. There is nothing I love more than playing shows. I like not having to be myself. And I like to feel the vibrations coarsing through my fingers, through the blisters, through the blood. After the Watts Hall show my bass teacher asked me if I had murdered someone with my bass, the blood was caked on so thick. No, no murders last night, just a punk show, a fifteen minute set (if that). School kind of sucks right now, but that is my fault. I chose to take all of my hard classes this year, I chose to graduate early. I can do this, it just sucks. And fuck it, I don't want to. School stresses me out, all of the fucking AP, SAT, SAT 2 fuck shit cunt motherfuckers I have to take this spring stress me out, and I hate myself when I'm stressed out, because I'm moody and I suck. But today I am happy. Dylan and I ditched the winter carnival to go smoke with Arno. I got my hair cut yesterday, and Arno is going to put it up in a mohawk for the show tomorrow. The fucking show. Thats why I'm happy today, because I know tomorrow I am going to be even happier. I'm not really looking forward to seeing any of the bands, except for maybe covered in bees. I'm really excited for next weekend's show, except I promised I'd take the exchange student with me, which will make everything akward, but fuck it, I won't let her ruin my fun. She'll have fun, I know it. I found a magazine article with an interview with Grant Bland, of Rudimentary Peni, and I special ordered the magazine and now I have my very own copy of it. I was hoping that their would be pictures, but sadly their weren't. I wanted to see if he really was a harelip. But I thought he was dead, for Nick Blinko lied to me in his book, but that was to be expected. I learned that Grant wrote Sacrifice, which is one of my favorite songs. Current Mood: high Current Music: Crucifucks (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Sunday, October 23rd, 2005
5:57 pm	I had the most wonderful dream last night. I was with Arno and my friends and Mr. P and we were all just kind of hanging out. Nothing really spectacular, but there were hugs and kisses and I just felt so loved. I feel like my entire life has been that dream, I feel so lucky to have been surrounded by so much love my whole life. Speaking of love, tomorrow is Arno and mine's two year aniversary. Hooray for us! I love to love, and I love to be loved. There is nothing more I could ask for. Current Mood: loved Current Music: Wating Room - Fugazi (Comment on this)
Thursday, October 20th, 2005
5:26 pm	Dripping Wet and Screaming Now is the Time I want to make music more than anything in the world. And not by myself, it just isn't the same. It seems every attempt to share something beautiful with others has failed, and goddamn it I'm ready to play! and play and play and play. And if only I could find someone who shares the same desires that I do, if only I could have someone to play with, I think I could be happy again. I'm tired of being hungry. I want to hear others music too. Whatever happened to punk in maine? Arno stopped putting on shows, thats what. Goddamn you lazy bastards, and goddamn me for not having the energy to do it myself. I can't wait for LA... I'm in deparate need of purification. If only the chocolates were still around... Current Mood: hungry Current Music: Hallucinating Pluto - The B52s (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 18th, 2005
3:07 pm	Kathy was a bit surreal, she painted all of her toes... I finally made the change. I woke up this morning and decided I was done. I showered, I dressed myself all pretty, I smiled, I was happy. I've finally learned that when you act positive positive things happen. Positivity = Posivity. Common sense, I know, but I've been retarded since the summer. I had been crying for about a week straight, but thats finally done. It wasn't even the purifying raining that I usually feel when I'm crying. This was like absorbtion. I was just absorbing all of the negative energy around me and was refusing to let it all go. I've let it go, and today I was happy and fuck all if anything anyone does can change that. I saw Dylan today and we talked. I finally had someone to play with, it was great. We decided we're going to have a wakenbakennljhna;io[a tomorrow morning. I'm excited. And then tomorrow afternoon I finally get to see Arno again. Tomorrow will be a good day. And the day after that. And the day after that. And the day after that... I finally finished Cats Cradle by Vonnegut and I started Breakfast of Champions. I have to start my Vonnegut project soon. Right now it is looking like an essay, which would be fine, but I wish I could think of a more creative way to show how Vonneguts life expierences and views have shaped his writing. There are so many books I want to read, but I just don't have the time. I'm glad life is long. Current Mood: happy Current Music: Hanging Around - Lou Reed (Comment on this)
Sunday, October 16th, 2005
10:41 pm	Piggies do things I can only dream of I just want someone to play with. that is all. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
1:15 pm	Precious Freak In the attic with two windows, Thoughts rip through with shrieking precision, And ooze through my mouth and onto the floor, Where they will bide their time in a stagnant pool. And what is left within the murky cave? Just a primitive death swirl of dust and mites, That spirals through to collect the remnants, That were trapped beneath the cobwebs and cracks. I’ll lay my coat down just for you, So you won’t dirty your feet on the mess I have made, But my coat is just cloth and my thoughts are like acid, And they’ll crawl up your legs and plunge into your womb, And within your purity I’ll have sprouted something new, A mutant, perhaps, with tungsten wings, A bullet smile and chemical lips, To keep our precious freak on a constant trip. Remember the world resides in our minds, And the visions you see mean nothing to me, We all need something to help us fly, When you lost yours, I found mine. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I didn't get to take my drivers test because I failed the eye exam. Apparently I'm blind. Now I need glasses, but I really don't want to go to the eye doctor. She's a bitch and they put shit in my eyes. I hate people going near my eyes goddamn it. My bass lesson today was fun. I learned Jumping Someone Else's Train and Killing an Arab by The Cure. I decided that this week I'd learn easier stuff since I had a hard time with the New Model Army from last week. But over all I've been getting much better. I learned about ten Rudimentary Peni songs this week all by myself along with Spirit of Keith Moon by Peter and the Test Tube Babies. I can't wait until I get my short scale bass, I'll be so much better. I went to Mainely Music today but they only had one short scale, and it was a rounded slammer that really wasn't that short scale. It was fairly nice and really cheap, but I didn't like it. I guess I'm going to have to go to bangor to look for basses some weekend. (Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 12th, 2005
5:56 pm	Succubuses Suck I hate her for what she does to Adam, I hate her for what shes done to dylan...and sarah....and luke...and probably everyone else she has ever met...they'll never be the same, I hate her for how she makes arno feel, I hate her for how she makes ME feel, I hate feeling so stupid, so used, but god damn it, most of all, I just hate myself because I can't fucking tell her. I write I write I write I write. So goes my life. I've been uber stressed lately, but what else is new. I'm taking my drivers test on friday. Wish me luck, because I deffinately need it. Mr. P hung up the poster I made for the summer colonization project on his wall. It was a pretty crappy poster too. Arno thinks it means he has a crush on me too. Oh Mr.P, how you make me blush. God I love my school girl crush. It feels so healthy, so NORMAL. Its amazing how beautiful something so silly can be. I got a cell phone. The number is 266 4246. Give me a call. Or just call to hear the message, Jeremy made it for me. It gives me a tither. School makes me lonely. I miss my friends. I haven't seen Dylan in days. He's too caught up in his solo music. I guess its ok. I've been talking to Walter a lot. And Hannah. I'm glad I have some friends at least. I've decided for halloween I will be beautiful. I will wear my wedding dress and dance. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Pulse For Andy Grotesque in their appearance, But absent in their minds, March the hordes of the radicals, Who claim they see, but are blind. Preaching words that leave no impact, Creating music with no thought, Their intelligence is just a semblance, Of the bullshit they were taught. Pulsing we dance as the heart beat of the world, The blood beats on in a never ending swirl, Of power, of passion, All lost in the field, That sprouts the rotting fruits, We devour, we praise. God be the pulse that drives us on, God be the blood to which we succumb, God be the acid that rips through our brains, If you ever tasted his power, You know you’d do the same. The sky glows neon, Our skin turns gray, Marked with the infernal pollution, That corrupts our fragile brains. Are you a product of your environment? Or just a reflection of the TV screen? Hypocritical in ever sense, You absorb their hatred like a fiend. Pulsing we dance as the heart beat of the world, The blood beats on in a never ending swirl, Of power, of passion, All lost in the field, That sprouts the rotting fruits, We devour, we praise. God be the pulse that drives us on, God be the blood to which we succumb, God be the acid that rips through our brains, If you ever tasted his power, You know you’d do the same. Let me be the pulse that drives us on, Let me be the blood to which we succumb, Let me be the acid that rips through our brains, I have tasted his power, And I will do the same. I will murder, I will steal, I will give into temptation, I will fuck over my fellow animal, For the good of the nation. Current Mood: artistic Current Music: Fugazi (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, October 5th, 2005
6:24 pm	A Beautiful Trip The ocean sprayed like a thousand diamonds, Each drop glistening like a child’s eye, I knew the sea was watching me, As we sat there, you and I. On that day we rose with the sun, And ascended into the sky, We licked the salt from each other’s lips, As we tripped there, you and I. People come and people go, Our trodden paths forever intertwined, Like a river of veins, through that summer in Maine, We lay like a candy cane, you and I. Sickly sweet our juices rained, One thunder, one lightning, one cry, Resonating through the mountains, as we drank from the fountains, That erupted from you and I. We walked the beach, hand in hand, Where you found a mermaid basking in a tidal pool, I wish I could have seen the fireworks you saw, But I could only find myself swimming in you. Current Mood: high Current Music: Adult Books - X (Comment on this)
Tuesday, October 4th, 2005
5:56 pm	The Primal Screamer Pressures from the womb are carried into life, By this coffin excreted through a tunnel without light, Filled with demons who hitch a ride, And open the lid to crawl inside. Skeletons in the attic, hanging by a thread, Three little dolls rest inside my head. I climb these steps, one at a time, My feet never ceasing their rhythm and rhyme, Imagination and reality are blurred into one, And never will be separated until I am done. Skeletons in the attic, hanging by a thread, Three little dolls rest inside my head, And as I release this primal scream, Society disappears and I am free. One child’s gingerbread is another child’s drugs, One plays will dolls, the other plays with guns, We must destroy what we know in order to create, And the loss of myself is a risk I will take. Skeletons in the attic, hanging by a thread, Three little dolls rest inside my head. There is beauty in everything, especially the grotesque, The things that disgust you are the things I like best, I’m a defective model with a dent in my brain, But don’t think you’re normal, we’re exactly the same. Skeletons in the attic, hanging by a thread, Three little dolls rest inside my head, And as I release this primal scream, Society disappears and I am free. So fuck your morality, There is no purpose I can see, And fuck you sensitivity, I don’t give a shit if you’re offended by me. So fuck your morality, There is no purpose I can see, And fuck your sobriety, You must live life with blurred vision in order to see. And as I release this primal scream, I know nobody hears except for me, Tongues unknown to outside ears, Speak the truth that nobody hears, And as I release this primal scream, Society disappears and I am free. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- For our two year aniversary I bought Arno The Primal Screamer - By Nick Blinko. I bought it early so I could read it before I gave it to him, I'm so selfish. But, I can't even describe how deeply it effected me. I just want to meet Nick Blinko. I don't want to hear him speak, I don't want to see him play.... I just want to taste him. I want to taste him like I tasted Dick Lucas. I want to taste his pain, I want to taste his passion, I want to taste his freedom...and no, I'm not saying I want to taste his penis. Bite me. And since I've read this book I've decided to take part in my own form of Primal Therapy. I've decided I need to sing more, I need to scream more, and I'm starting to simplify my lyrics. I just find that place inside my head, the place where I don't think, the place where only my most carnal insticts reside, and I take that voice that speaks to me, the one with no words, and I put it into words. These songs may not be as good to others who read them, but they mean so much more to me. The human mind is amazing. All of them are. And the world is amazing. All of it is. I want to travel it so badly. I'm considering just fucking college and going to Europe with Arno. I want to buy a cheap shitty car and just drive all across it, but I have a feeling (if this plan ever goes through) once Arno and I hit Amsterdam we'd never move on. I'm happy. So fucking happy. I've been going hiking a lot with Arno, his mom, and his cousin James. I love those hikes. I need to play more. I really want to go outside and run around, but I can't seem to find anyone to play with. Or the time. School has me so fucking bogged down. I can't wait until its over. Its so close I can taste it. And do you know what it tastes like? Dick Lucas's sweat. Current Mood: complacent Current Music: Rudimentary Peni (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, September 14th, 2005
2:56 pm	I keep having this strange reoccurring dream where I mercilessly beat the shit out of Sean Wignall, and he's on the ground and crying and I just keep beating him. I don't have anything against him, I think I just want to see him cry. I spent all of last weekend tripping balls with Arno. On Friday afternoon we got completely naked and sat in a closet for three hours listening to "Push the Little Daisies" by Ween on repeat. We talked and fucked and were all philosophical and explorative and creative and it just seemed like the way John Lennon and Yoko Ono would have spent an afternoon, except better because it didn't involve John Lennon or Yoko Ono. It was perfect. Arno, Eric and I might be starting a new wave band. I really want eric to play the keytar. That would kick ass. We need more people though, because a new wave band with three people wouldn't really work. I mean, who the fuck needs a guitarist or a drummer? Well, maybe we'd use a drum machine...but fuck people. I'm back in school now. Its a lot nicer than last year. I like all of my classes and I've stopped stressing out so I think it will be a good year. I just miss Luke. I miss a lot of people. School is lonely now. I get to see Mr. P every day now, and I can't describe to you how absolutely creamy and dreamy AP History with him is. The surprising thing is that I'm actually learning stuff, I'm not just staring at him like I thought I would. I can do both! hooray for me. Current Mood: calm Current Music: Everything Turns Grey - Agent Orange (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, September 1st, 2005
11:34 pm	I just had to write this down before I forgot it I was typing an essay for english when I actually wrote this: "Burgess uses sex in his novel to show how little regard Alex has for other people and to show how much of a turd he is." Holy shit I've got to stop smoking pot. (Comment on this)
7:34 pm	So Dylan didn't show up at practice yesterday, the fucking bastard. Its not like he promised he'd be there or like I had shit to do or anything. He hasn't been returning my phone calls either. I know I've said it a thousand times, probably many more, but I just wish that asshole would grow up and get some balls all ready. THAT FUCKING ASS! But, I tried not to let it bring me down too much. Arno and I had a fabulous day yesterday. We hotboxed his closet with Arlo, Zach, Jason, Nat, Davey P., and John. We smoked a fat ass joint that held about a quater of weed. Arlo was looking for munchies and all he could find was bread, so I gave him the idea to make cinnamin toast bread in the oven. It tasted quite delicious. I put sprinkles on mine. Today I stayed home and worked. I actually slept until 12:30, which was nice and since then I've just been doing my english homework. I'm almost done too. I really want to go to the Blue Hill Fair. I hope Arno is able to take me. I just found a dried up leaf on my computer table. I don't know how or why it got there. I wish I did. I bet it had a great story that I just can't remember anymore. Current Mood: hot Current Music: Basket Case - Green Day (3 Comments |Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 31st, 2005
9:01 am	Swallows = The Balls Swallows doesn't sing, She fucking screams, And I get what I want if you know what I mean, I'm a my little pony with cloven hooves, My eyes on the prize, And my hands on the goods. With my machete at my side, and my dick knife in tow, Pour me a shot and I'm ready to go. So what do I swallow? You think you fucking know? But the only thing you know is how to suck my fucking balls. I swallow every asshole that gets in my way, I've swallowed maine, Next I'll swallow L.A. I swallow memories, moments, I even swallow time, But will I swallow your cum? Hell no, you'll swallow mine. So do I disgust you? Or just make you wince? I fuck with the senses and I always win. I abuse my own body, I rip it to shreds, I'm dying to live and I live for death. I'm high on life, and I'm high on drugs too, I poison my body with only the cheapest of booze. So what the fuck does swallows know? She's just a little girl, All I know is that I don't just own you, I own this fucking world. I swallow every asshole that gets in my way, I've swallowed maine, Next I'll swallow L.A. I swallow memories, moments, I even swallow time, But will I swallow your cum? Hell no, you'll swallow mine. I'll swallow whatever you give me, As long as you promise me life, And I'll swallow whatever you give me, As long as you tell me its mine. ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Today is the first Nerve Endings practice in a long time. I'm excited. We'll see how things go. I'm wearing my cop dress, it makes me feel pretty. My wedding dress I bought at good will makes me feel prettier. I wish I could wear it to school. I wish I could wear it every day. Last night Arno and I had a long talk. My worries are over and my priorities are back on track. I'm proud of myself, and I'm so lucky I have such good friends. Arno bought me, Adam and him these little eggs made out of rocks and they are all shiny and shimmer and translucent, but opaque. I rub it when I'm upset/nervous/stressed and it makes me feel better. Light shines through these things like lightning. Me, Adam, and Arno appreciate it, thats why we are soul mates. I'm done waiting for the future. My life is now. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: Sometimes I - The Plasmatices (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 2nd, 2005
10:50 am	Disorder Rating Paranoid: Moderate Schizoid: Moderate Schizotypal: Moderate Antisocial: Low Borderline: Very High Histrionic: High Narcissistic: High Avoidant: High Dependent: Very High Obsessive-Compulsive: Low -- Personality Disorder Test -- -- Personality Disorder Information -- (Comment on this)
Sunday, July 24th, 2005
10:32 am	I tell you, if God wants to take me he will (a series of random thoughts left unsaid for weeks) The Subhumans show/the journey down there were the best two days of my life I believe. On the way down there Arno and I made about a thousand pointless stops, but they were all completely worth it. We went to Fort Knox, Old Orchard Beach, the salvation army in some wierd town, the Denny's in Rockland to see Shane, and a flea market on the side of the high way. On the way back we got lost and ended up in the white mountains of New Hampshire. We also stopped at another salvation army where I bought a bitchin skirt that I fixed up yesterday. I meant to make it long enough to wear to school, but I fucked up and its ten inches. Katherine needs to learn how to measure. Anyways, before the show we hung out with Brett Threat and Joanne because the opening bands sucked. It was nice to hang out with them, I never really had before. A couple of people have told me that Joanne reminds them of me in a couple of years. I'm not so sure about that. Anyway, when it was time for the Subhumans Arno and I pushed are way to the front where I ended up pushed right against the stage directly in the center below Dick. bitchin. His sweat kept dripping on me and I ate it. I told people it tasted like tea and crumpets, but it didn't. It tasted just like mine. It was really wierd, because I expected them to be this big, tough, angry band, but in reality they were really bouncy and happy, and you could tell they really loved what they were doing. Their bassist was fat and jolly, he made me smile. They played Pigman and Society, that really made me smile. After seeing them live I have much more respect for them. Yesterday I got into a serious fight with my mom because she wants to keep me in on week nights during the school year. Stupid, I know, but it really freaked me out. I will have literally zero friends in school next year. I just don't want to feel any lonlier than I all ready do. I need to see Arno. I need to see Luke. I need to see Adam. She ended up getting really angry at me apparently, because an hour or two later I went into the living room where she was watching tv, and the second I sat down she turned off the tv, grabbed her shit and ran out the door. I think it was one of the most hurtful things anyone has ever done to me. Thank god arno showed up about five minutes later and made me feel better. Then my mom decided to feel bad and came to apologize to me. She offered me twenty dollars. The fucking bitch is trying to buy my love. I flat out told her what she was doing and she said "haven't I bought your love all ready?" I'm glad my mother thinks so highly of me. I'm not my fucking sister. My mom can stick her twenty dollars up her dried out cunt. Jimbo got into some serious trouble with the police, and now he is leaving. I'm really going to miss him. I hope I meet up with him in LA, or back here another year. The other day two little girls stopped me while I was walking down the street to tell me they liked my hair. It made me feel awkward, not good. I don't know why. Yesterday I tried to do some homework, and I just couldn't write anything. After about an hour I got fed up and said fuck it. I think I'm just freaking myself out about next year. I can do it, I know I can. Goddamn it I need to start working. Today damn it, today! Mr. P........yummy. God I miss him. I miss Luke and Dylan too. I feel drained. I've been feeling like that a lot lately. Maybe I'm burning out. I ran yesterday and I ran today. I hadn't run in a while, but whats new. I thought I had something to say, apparently I didn't. Current Mood: dissatisfied Current Music: Within - Neurosis and Jarboe (Comment on this)
Wednesday, July 13th, 2005
10:25 pm	Hot! Hot! Hot! PINK!!!!!!!!!!! Well, I dyed my hair. After changing my mind every week for about a year, five minutes before I was going to dye it navy blue and silvery purple I changed my mind yet again, then ran to rite aid and bought hot pink. Now I look like gwen stafani, but about ten times hotter (but thats just because I make good music, and she doesn't). For about an hour I was a blonde. It was really scary looking, but I kind of liked it. I walked around Bar Harbor and I looked like fucking tank girl. It made me happy. I'll be blonde for longer some day. Maybe a full day. Thats all I think the world could really handle of a bleached blonde Katherine. Sally and I had an erotic moment today. While Arno was dying my hair she rubbed my bare scalp with cold conditioner. It was tre sexy. I speak french. sort of. Summer is so fun, but sounds so lame written down. I go to work, I see friends, I drink, I do drugs, I sleep. Its a good life. Subhumans on Monday. HOORAY! Current Mood: excited Current Music: Drugs of Youth - Subhumans (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Saturday, July 9th, 2005
12:30 pm	last night I felt drained, physically and emotionally, and today I just feel ungrateful. I know he appreciates it, it goes with out saying, I just forget that sometimes. I need constant reassurance, I wish it wasn't like that. My bass lessons are going pretty super. I can play black lung now. I kick ass. I want to bake bread, but we don't have any yeast. Baking bread is one of my favorite things to do. I think I just like playing with the dough. And knowing that I've created something with my bare hands, something yummy that people enjoy. Everybody should bake bread at least once in their life. Its a very satisfying activity. It makes me feel beautiful, no matter how I really look. I want to be beautiful today. I want to be happy to. And have fun. I want to write, but nothing seems to be coming out. I never seem to be able to write in the summer. I'll try today. I need to. And I'll have fun today. I need to. And I'll be nice to Arno, and not moody and bitchy and we'll have lots of fun. Because he deserves it. And I want to make him happy. I need to. Current Mood: anxious Current Music: black lung - rancid, because I kick ass (Comment on this)
Sunday, June 19th, 2005
8:51 am	Do ninjas back down for battle? NO FUCKING WAY! They didn't play that song, but it didn't matter. They played Walker Taliban Ranger, which was all I needed. Awesome show, awesome day. Arno, Luke, and I spent the entire day wasted off our asses. We went to the playground and played on the swings which made me happy. Alex came to the show, which made me very happy since I hadn't seen him in so long. It was good to see everybody, I felt much more personable than I did at the last show, a lot less of an ass. Yesterday was my official start of summer. I've got two days left of school, but fuck it, I'm checking out. I'll study for finals today, but other than that I've done all that I can do. I'm not failing biology anymore so I could really give a shit at this point. I'm ready for junior year, I'm ready for senior year and getting married, and then I'm ready for LA. Friday night Arno and I went to see his mom's band play at the White Birches which was really nice. I met Arno's mimi, who made really yummy fudge and gave good hugs. Arno's Aunt Ivey was plastered too, she told me she wanted to take one of the table clothes and turn it into a cape and fly around the room. Then she fell into the table. Lesson Learned: I LOVE ARNO'S FAMILY. I've decided this summer I'm dedicating all sundays to homework since I have so fucking much of it. Oh well, its important stuff, sort of. Today is my first bass lesson, I'm so excited. So hung over, but so excited. If you want to meet me, meet me at the show, Its the only place you'll meet the me you want to know... Current Mood: good Current Music: I Want to Piss On You - GG Allin (Comment on this)
Tuesday, June 14th, 2005
5:13 pm	Desperate Eyes For Sally We walked together through the snow, I clutching that book to my chest, And you clutching your heart, And on that winter’s eve as the snow drops fell, Dancing through the air like ghosts, We thought we were the ones who were dead, But we were wrong. Knowledge sought through death reveals the truth, Which held the answers we so desperately craved, Until half crazed with starvation our fangs would salivate, Glistening with contempt for the ones that held meat. And together we walked. Curious, curious, but always afraid, That our blackened eyes would fade, Into the ice, into the snow, And melt away, Renewed, Reborn. (Comment on this)